You'll probably never read this, and that's just as well, because I know that our relationship is water long gone under that bridge. But there are things I want you to know. You did the right thing by breaking up with me, though it has taken me three and a half years to understand and accept that. We aren't made for each other, and we never were. We just found similar qualities in each other that we thought would make a relationship, but we both know now that it takes a lot more than just liking the same books and jokes.
So many people gloss over teenage relationships. So many people in our lives seem to forget that there was ever an “us.” But, heartbreaks and hearts mended in youth shape who we become as adults.Yes, my sophomore year of high school was forever ago it seems, and there are some who would criticize me for taking so long to move on, but I've learned a lot about myself, and you, and God these past few years, and I need to get some things off my chest.
I still want to be friends. The qualities we share that made a relationship fail would flourish in a friendship, but it has yet to be seen if that will happen. I miss talking to you, three years later. I miss telling you every thought that comes through my head and asking if you've seen the commercial for the newest Marvel movie. But that's okay, I'll be fine. I don't have a hole in my chest that you left; that healed a long time ago. What I do have is a lot of regrets and missed opportunities. However, there is no sense in chasing what-ifs, it only leads down a slew of rabbit holes... I miss the friendship and laughter, I miss the spark between us (because no matter how you spin it, we had great chemistry).
I've learned we both messed up our relationship. We were both immature. I didn't know how to handle conflict. You really didn't want a girlfriend in the first place, you just didn't want to lose me as a friend. For that reason, it's pretty obvious that we shouldn't have dated. I really think God just let me have you so that I could learn a lesson. I learned a lot of lessons, not all of them bad. But there were nights I cried myself to sleep and slept as long as possible to not have to feel the pain of having lost you. You changed me, and I hope I changed you, too.
I hope you never forget me. I hope we meet in a coffee shop in 10 years and spend some time catching up. I hope you know that I kept sacred everything you ever trusted me with, and If you ever needed me, I'd be there in a heartbeat. You gave me a lot of pain, but you brought me a lot of laughter, too.
You're not the father of my future children. You are not the one to which I will turn to in 50 years and say, "After all this time?" But you are the one who made me learn a lot about myself and other people, and I pray that you find a lifetime of happiness with the girl you loved after me even if sometimes, it stings a little.
Because of all this, I texted you tonight, and said "I'm genuinely glad you're happy." and though it's been a long time since I needed anything from you, I need you to know that I meant that.
I still want to be friends. The qualities we share that made a relationship fail would flourish in a friendship, but it has yet to be seen if that will happen. I miss talking to you, three years later. I miss telling you every thought that comes through my head and asking if you've seen the commercial for the newest Marvel movie. But that's okay, I'll be fine. I don't have a hole in my chest that you left; that healed a long time ago. What I do have is a lot of regrets and missed opportunities. However, there is no sense in chasing what-ifs, it only leads down a slew of rabbit holes... I miss the friendship and laughter, I miss the spark between us (because no matter how you spin it, we had great chemistry).
I've learned we both messed up our relationship. We were both immature. I didn't know how to handle conflict. You really didn't want a girlfriend in the first place, you just didn't want to lose me as a friend. For that reason, it's pretty obvious that we shouldn't have dated. I really think God just let me have you so that I could learn a lesson. I learned a lot of lessons, not all of them bad. But there were nights I cried myself to sleep and slept as long as possible to not have to feel the pain of having lost you. You changed me, and I hope I changed you, too.
I hope you never forget me. I hope we meet in a coffee shop in 10 years and spend some time catching up. I hope you know that I kept sacred everything you ever trusted me with, and If you ever needed me, I'd be there in a heartbeat. You gave me a lot of pain, but you brought me a lot of laughter, too.
You're not the father of my future children. You are not the one to which I will turn to in 50 years and say, "After all this time?" But you are the one who made me learn a lot about myself and other people, and I pray that you find a lifetime of happiness with the girl you loved after me even if sometimes, it stings a little.
Because of all this, I texted you tonight, and said "I'm genuinely glad you're happy." and though it's been a long time since I needed anything from you, I need you to know that I meant that.